Love

Congratulations, John and Emily!

on my way to 1000 gifts

46. a gifted diagnostician for a preceptor
47. Pandora on the Blackberry at the gym
48. low-lying fog covering the tops of corn stalks on my Austin drive
49. audio books for my 1.5 hour roundtrip commute to clinical
50. the Blanshan invasion of Valleyfair
51. an infant niece falling asleep on my chest
52. the two laidback professors I serve for my grad assist position
53. two friends who find their life-partner in each other
54. the chance to stand up for them at their wedding and beyond
55. fields of peaceful, mystical windmills as far as the eye can see

I try to be cool, but it just doesn't work.

Last Thursday was my first day of clinicals in my nurse practitioner program. This was an important day, my first encounter with the professional I'll be working with all semester, seeing and treating patients. And I wanted to make a good impression.

So I wore make-up.

Now you have to understand, I rarely wear make-up. Sometime since Bob and I started dating, I became more comfortable with myself and lost the need to cover up my imperfections. Love changes you like that. But that's a different post.

The point is-I just don't wear make-up that often. I used to, so I have a little routine and I'm comfortable putting it on. But, you see, I got a new mascara for the wedding a few months ago, and I haven't used it since until last Thursday.

This mascara is a little different. First you put on this white protein layer, let it dry, then put on a dark layer. The first layer is supposed to make your lashes longer, somehow.

So I got dressed up in my new professional clothes, put on some make-up, took my coffee mug in hand and headed out the door.

And the day was busy. We hopped from room to room, seeing all kinds of patients. My mind was reeling from all the new knowledge I was absorbing. Finally, at noon, I went to the bathroom. And I looked in the mirror.

And my eyelashes were white.

In a split second, my mind was racing with the possibilities as to what might make my eyelashes turn such an unnatural color. And it quickly hit me--I had never put on the darker layer of my mascara.

Now what? I can't get it off--I need mascara remover. I didn't want to leave the bathroom and look stupid--it is my first day! Have I already been looking stupid all morning? It wasn't tremendously noticable if you weren't looking right at me...but surely someone had and wondered what strange albino condition I had that made my hair and eyebrowns dark brown and my eyelashes white.

Sigh. And this is what I get for painting myself up.

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." 1 Pet. 3:3

Ok, just a few more for today

26. Singing in the car with Polly, Peggy, and Bob
27. playing a song on the piano and singing loudly when I'm by myself
28. my salt and pepper grinders
29. An employer who pays for grad school
30. Friends who call me for favors
31. Plants that perk up when you open the blinds
32. Dishwashers
33. Red juicy tomatoes in the backyard
34. the farmers' market on Saturday mornings
35. the funny lady who plays the accordion at the farmers' market
36. decent health insurance
37. finding I can throw a pizza in the oven when I first turn it on and it will be done by the time the oven warms up
38. best friends who live 30 yards away
39. the hymn "Be Still My Soul"
40. Singing Fridays in chapel at Harding
41. the chance to hold a dying man's hand
42. the chance to hold a mom while her first child neared death
43. Kutzky Park volleyball court
44. Little friends who run to greet me every Wednesday night
45. Pryor 109

Give Thanks

I love lists. I usually have at least one hanging around. Today I saw this idea: making a list of 1,000 things you are thankful for.



That's an awful big number. It could take me a while. But I think it may be a fun and rewarding way to combat the pressure that is going to come...and last....for the next few months. So here goes nothing. Over the next little bit I'll be counting out my blessings one by one-until I hit 1,000. Steal the graphic and join me!

1. I have been saved from my sin by the grace of the Lord!
2. I am surrounded by friends who constantly challenge and encourage me (i.e. "The Community")
3. I had a healthy childhood
4. Patients who come back to visit the ICU--healthy
5. I have never had to struggle with a chemical addiction
6. Parents who have been married 31 (I think?) years this week
7. Growing up under the influence of Johnny Markham
8. Walking home on my lunch break to see my husband
9. An 8-minute walking commute to work
10. A job that lets me make a difference in lives of children
11. Being able to buy my cute old house
12. Having a husband who is handy at fixing things
13. PB&J
14. Burt's Bees Chapstick
15. Becoming friends with Jennifer Allen
16. Ice cream
17. my Bible(s)
18. a husband who studies Biblical principles in his spare time
19. the engraving on my wedding band
20. the current Honda
21. Harriet the Hatchback Honda
22. mornings
23. a good cup of coffee
24. my rockin' thesis partners-Jenn & Kristina
25. children laughing

:-)

Washington Weekend Adventure

I'm always looking for a good excuse to get on a plane and see what adventures wait for me on the other side of the runway, though this time I was not excited about leaving my weekend-working husband behind. Even so when BenFriend (explanation-he's called BenFriend because we were such good friends in college that everyone thought he was my boyfriend, but we were just friends) told me he was getting married in Washington State, I knew I was going to be there.

It was extremely fun and convenient that one of my best friends and her husband just moved to Seattle in June. So I had a place to stay and people to hang out with while waiting for the wedding festivities.

Amy and Matt picked me up from the airport of Friday, and we took the ferry across the Puget Sound, then continued driving up to NW Washington. We found some pretty things on our way there.

We stayed at a real home-style bed and breakfast, complete with llamas, hummingbirds, and a home cooked sprawling breakfast, all for $50 for the three of us.

We went up north to see the temperate rain forest Washington has, where more than 12 feet of rain falls each year.

We stopped at Ruby Beach on the way back to say hi to the Pacific Ocean and marvel at the huge amount of driftwood, smooth as glass by the battering of the sea.

We found this delightful waterfall on a detour looking for the "world's largest spruce tree".

And after passing it twice, we finally found the mammoth tree.

On Sunday, the wedding was beautiful, going off with only one hitch.

I caught a red-eye flight back to the Midwest and was more than happy to see my wonderful husband waiting for me at 6am at the airport. A lovely weekend, but there's no place like home.

Update

Not that you were holding your breath or anything....but I'm better now. I still like my house. I still think it is silly we're spending so much time and money on it. But I'm ok with how things are and the path we've chosen. The kitchen floor is done, the house is put back together, my husband has pampered me, and I can now cook in my kitchen again. Life isn't so bad.

Therapeutic post

I don't know if I am cut out for this.

I don't know why I bought a fixer-upper house. I'm still not sure why I bought a house, period.

I don't even care about it. I'm leaving this crumbling place soon. Very soon, in the big scheme of things. I'm not emotionally attached to it. I'm not going to raise a family here. I get minimal satisfaction out of completed projects--because there aren't any. I started painting a year ago, and still have more to go. I started working on the yard several months ago-and it's still an ugly jungle. We started re-doing the kitchen back in the dead of winter-and it's still going.

I'm tired of running to Menard's or Lowe's every other day. Or every day the past week. Or twice a day today. I'm tired of adding more and more dollars on the tab of money I've spent on this house. It's ridiculous. Probably not a large amount of money as far as home improvements go, but too much for me. I've got better things to spend my money on.

Like trips to Honduras. I'm dying to go.

It just seems stupid. People are starving all over the world, churches beg for funds to help the homeless, my own friends can't get to Africa to work with the poor because of funding, and I pour money into a tiny, odd conglomeration of wood.

I'm tired of things like hearing the stair rail rip out of the wall. The fridge leaking water in the dining room while it's displaced out of the kitchen. Window frames breaking in my hand. Starting one project to discover three others. Decorations peeling paint off the wall. Stripping screws. Rotten wood. Broken bits. Torn up hands. Dust everywhere. Mediocre results. Making mistakes that cost time and money.

And yet, I can't stop. I (and now, Bob) have started trying to salvage this house, and we've dug ourselves holes we have to get out of (or should I say, patch over) if we ever want to have hope of selling this house to at least recover the money we've put into it.

And I have a hard time looking over the imperfections. I know the guest room closet is still purple even though I never go in it. I know the outside spicket in the front doesn't work even though I've never had to use it. I know there are at least two torn window screens, even though most people would never see them.

Pathetic, aren't I?

I know, I know. I know all the good reasons to have a house--it's financially smart, you have a place to host others, it's a ministry tool, I'm learning useful skills, etc. I've repeated them to myself and so many others enough times to make you nauseous. But right now, with summer passing by with me spending most days working on projects that are only going to look so-so, it seems absolutely a waste of time.

And this is the mood I'm in.

A Week of New Things

Sometimes change is nice. Here's a few new things in our life from the last week.

New tile in the kitchen


New haircut #1


New haircut #2


New flowers from the yard

New tomatoes peeking out

New vehicle in the drive

Blast from the past

I first did this two years ago. Here's the 2009 version.

What's on my desk:
a list of places where I need to change my name
a whole bunch of thank you cards that need to be written
the second book in the Mark of the Lion series

What's in my fridge:
Fuze drinks
Yogurt
leftover homemade ice cream

What's on my floor:
a considerable layer of dust from the kitchen project
the charger for my new Blackberry

What's on my mind:
If I am capable of successfully completing previously mentioned kitchen project
Ways to save money, water, and electricity
Honduras
Africa
my husband
the start of my last year of grad school looming in the near future