Sing Praises

I just got this email update from the missionaries in India I worked with in January. This, my friends, is what fills me with peace and joy, and it is my purpose in life. My part in this story is so small it is almost not worth mentioning, but this story God is writing is bringing glory to him and bringing others into his kingdom here on earth and for all eternity. He can use even haphazard, ineffective clinics like the one I took part in as an opening paragraph to yet another chapter in the greatest story ever told. Enjoy, and thanks to all who helped me take part. It means so much to me when you understand that "I have but one candle of life to burn, and I would rather burn it out in a land filled with darkness than in a land flooded with light" (John Keith Falconer)

Good News

Yesterday was a GREAT day.

About 1 month ago 2 nurses from the states, our two Edge girls and myself did a small medical clinic in a village about 35 miles from our city. The event was done on the doorstep of the Imam's house (Muslim pastor). Yesterday a team of 4 Americans and I returned to the same village to dedicate a new church and four Christian men to the Lord. All of them are new believers and will be baptized in a week or two. This is the first church ever planted in this village, a place that 5,000 people call home.

Of course, my two small trips to the village did not do a great deal to start the church. However, God has allowed me to spend a lot of time working with a MBB evangelist who lives in that area and through his testimony, four men came to faith. 1 or 2 of them will lead that church. Incidentally, two of the four men who were dedicated yesterday join us for the big distribution we did last month.

I can't begin to tell you how happy this makes us. Playing a role in The Kingdom, regardless how small, is a great feeling. It is moments like this that bring a deeper meaning to "Who am I Lord…"

Thank you for praying,

Chris and Debbie

Many Faiths, Many Journeys

This slogan "Many Faiths, Many Journeys" was posted on many billboards and postcards throughout India. I found it catchy, but kind of harrowing at the same time. At times, the stats below and the reality of the human situation was almost overwhelming. But it was encouraging to meet a few faithful Christians, all of whom had been beaten, disowned, or severely persecuted for their faith.

The faith breakdown of the 1 billion+ population:
Hindu: 80.5%
Muslim: 13.4%
Christian: 2.3%

Everyone you looked was an image of some deity or a makeshift altar. The stories of idol worship found in the Old Testament came alive right in front of me. Many rickshaw drivers had a picture of their personal god taped to the front of their vehicle. Flowers offered to images of stone lay randomly scattered around town. Every 100 yards, there seemed to be another temple, some large, like the monkey temple I've pictured here, and some small, like the picture below.

I am so grateful for grace, for the fact my God is alive, and that he is good. Which reminds me of a very relevant conversation between Lucy, Susan, and the Beavers.....

“Is – is he a man?” asked Lucy.

“Aslan a man!” said Mr. Beaver sternly. Certainly not. I tell you he is the King of the wood and the son of the great Emperor- beyond-the-Sea. Don’t you know who is the King of Beasts? Aslan, he is a lion – the Lion, the great Lion.”

“Ooh!” said Susan, “I’d thought he was a man. Is he – quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion.”

“That you will, dearie, and no mistake,” said Mrs. Beaver; “if there’s anyone who can appear before Aslan without their knees knocking, they’re either braver than most or else just silly.”

“Then he isn’t safe?” said Lucy.

“Safe?” said Mr. Beaver; “don’t you hear what Mrs. Beaver tells you? Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King I tell you.”

Amen. He's the King, and he is so good, even when he's not safe.

India

There is no good way to sum up India. The only manageable way I can think to do this is through pictures. For the next couple of posts, I'm going to pick a few of the most telling, and say a few words about what I thought and felt over these last few weeks. In some ways, I'm still processing and somewhat reeling from it all.

When I glance over all my pictures, this is the one which draws my eyes over and over again. I want you to make it larger if your computer will let you and take a good look at it. It says so much to me.

The woman in the middle is the embodiment of the old India. She is just hanging out in the traditional pose many use for waiting, working in the fields, going to the bathroom. I imagine she was like that because it was the warmest, most comfortable way she could be while waiting for whatever she was waiting on. Her clothes, though old and dirty, are still made of the bright, flowing, modest fabric donned by most women. I wouldn't last 30 seconds in that position. There is no telling how many hours of her life she has spent that way.

Notice the relatively small trash pile behind her, with every bit of anything valuable picked out of it as a way of making a living for many people. There is a dead cow lying near the wall. At least it wasn't a dead person, which I also saw sprawled out on a sidewalk, but didn't have the time or the audacity to take a picture of.

Now, in defense of India, I'm not for sure the guy was dead. But judging by the contortion of his limbs, his disheveled clothing, and the blotchy color of his legs, it is a pretty safe guess. How long had he been there? How long would it be before someone removed his body? What does that say about how valuable a life is in India? How many more people are there just like him--dead, or nearly so--while the rest of the world rushes on?

Back to the picture.

Bicycles are everywhere. Cycle rickshaws are one of the cheapest forms transportation. It is the best way to see what all is around you. The bad thing is that it is also a great way for everyone to see you, especially if you are the rare white person. Instant entertainment for the whole community. Little wooden shops that sell all sorts of items or services are lining the streets, right next to gigantic brick or stone buildings that have been there for centuries. You can get a haircut, a pack of gum, a kilo of fruit, and a pirated movie probably on the same block. And at India prices with an American checking account, it is so tempting to not do it.

One of the Best Things about Nursing

I find it funny that I am writing this now considering my last post.

But nevermind. One of the best things about nursing is that you are qualified to do so many things. The options are almost unlimited. You get tired of one area, you go to another. And for people like me, people who thrive on change and learning new things, this is a serious plus.

Starting next weekend, I will no longer work in adult general medicine/nephrology. I will work in the pediatric intensive care unit at the same hospital.

This was a huge decision for me. Because of the intense orientation program I need to complete, I was told I would not be able to continue graduate school and do this new job. So I needed to pick. I chose to delay school for a year to do this. I don't know if it was the right decision. I had planned on getting through school as quickly as possible in order to go on with my real dream: serving the Lord internationally somehow related to health care. But I feel good about it now that the 'down year' is halfway over. But I found out later that I had to take one class to keep my spot in the program, so I am still doing school and orientation, just not as much school as I would have.

I'm excited to work with younger ones and their families. I love working with crisis situations, and when parents have a kid in the PICU, they are scared out of their mind. I love teaching and helping people understand what is going on, so I think this will be a good fit for me. Plus, not that I have learned everything, but I feel stagnated on my current unit. I need a change. So here we go.

Bless their hearts...

A true Southerner once told me you can say anything about someone as long as you end the rant with "bless their hearts..."

So here it goes. I apologize now for my complaining and rambling.

I am seriously losing my patience and compassion. People are often demanding, difficult, and neurotic. What honestly makes people think they are the center of the universe and that the need to rearrange their bedside table is so much more important than excruciating pain, delirium, death, etc....? Do people honestly think they have rented my personal attention out by the hour? Maybe I should educate them about our premium suite unit where they can pay $500 extra dollars a night to have personal nursing attention and a private chef? Do they think that I have nothing better to do than find Wheel of Fortune on the tv for them...for the third time in an hour? That I have unlimited narcotics in my back pocket? That I run Mayo Clinic and can change the system that serves over 100,000 patients a year in 20 minutes just for them? That I can devise a shorter route to get to x-ray across one of the biggest hospitals in the States because they don't feel like taking a ride for 10 minutes?

Hospital nursing makes me want to drink much more than the single bottle of delicious Merlot my roommate gave me for Christmas. I yelled at a dying man today. I don't really feel bad about it because he yelled at me in confusion and restlessness for 12 hours. He had a reason to yell, because he's fatally bleeding out through his scrotum. (Yes, wince greatly, guys). But I had had enough of the yelling and all my other patients and the non-nursing staff freaking out because they could hear him screaming.

I flat-out laughed at another man to his face today. He had big-time pain too, from multiple weeping sores in his tree trunk sized legs. One leg was bleeding all over the place, open without a dressing to catch the myriad of nasty bugs that can be found on almost every surface in a hospital. So I attempted to dress it, like a good nurse should. He yelled. He cursed. He told me to leave him alone. That he couldn't believe that in the best hospital in the world (that is debatable) with the best nurses in the world (probably untrue) that he couldn't believe we would do such a thing.

I laughed in his face. And kept dressing his gross wounds while he belittled every aspect of my professional practice. He called me his angel later in between breaths of yelling at his doctor because I brought the almighty pain meds. Oh, how the tides turn...

I got a new admission in the middle of morning craziness. I put him in his room and didn't talk to him for 4 hours. I just looked in on him as I walked past the door. I made the judgment that he was ok and could wait until I got everything else settled. I talked to him for 15 minutes to get the necessary paperwork done, and barely saw him the rest of the day. Screaming dying guy, cussing leg wound guy, along with teary diarrheal grandma were enough to fill the rest of my day.

Not one of my patients could walk by themselves. Only one could actually turn himself over. All but one is diabetic, which means frequent blood sugar checks and subsequent insulin shots. 3 had multiple IV meds. Dying guys gets pain and anxiey meds every hour (yet still screams). 2 had diarrhea (remember, they can't walk...) One can't pee at all. One pees constantly. 2 are bleeding. 2 were crying. One guy is detoxing from alcohol and pot.

Oh, and it's Christmas, so every family member from here to California is calling and wanting to talk to their loved one. The phone is right beside them, but, alas, they can't turn over to pick it up. So who gets paged to talk to their family on the phone, go down the hall to look up the room phone number, come back to the original phone, transfer the call in the room, then run down the hallway to go pick it up? That would be me. And me again. And again.

Did I mention that all the other patients on the unit are just as intense and 50% of our staff for the day were not our regular nurses (i.e. they don't know where anything is, how our systems work, that we are a pilot unit for a whole new computer system...)? I felt worse for them than I did my own situation. So to keep those nurses from crying, I tried to do what I could for them. And it seems respiratory therapy, physical therapy, occupational therapy, lab techs, iv techs, and catheter techs all had a magnetic attraction to me with random questions as if I held the magical answer concerning every problem for every patient down the whole 36 bed hall. Chaos.

So we have this classification system that determines our nursing/patient ration that we fill out several times a day. 1-6, with 6 as the most intense care you can get. A 5 usually earns you a nurse to yourself. Today my patients classified as two 5s and two 3s. And it was just me.

Even the medical staff recognized what a ridiculous day it was. I had one resident seek me out to give me a high five for the way I handled crisis #23 of the day and a consultant praise me in front of his whole team for my suggestions concerning meds and a feasible plan for leg wound guy. Two families thanked me for my care, one calling me the best damn nurse they'd had in all their husband's hospitalizations.

Oh, my dear, smelly, messy, demanding patients. Bless your hearts...

Winter Fun

The international community of Rochester recently gathered at my apartment for the first ever
International Buffet Celebration.

The collaborative menu:

Goat meat (Nigeria)
Austrian pancakes
Kung Pao chicken (China)
Potato dumplings (Germany)
Baleadas (Honduras)
Churros (Mexico)
Bangers and mash (London)
Mexican casserole
Pop (Canada, lol)

















And the first winter storm came. My home silently and quickly turned into a beautiful yet slippery snowglobe.

No Regrets

You don't typically see homeless people in Rochester. They are here, no doubt, but you don't normally see them with their signs sitting on a corner asking for help. But one was here recently.

There was this guy sitting on a corner near my apartment yesterday. I thought to myself, "I should help him." But I stalled. I was already late.

I came home down the same highway, and he was still there. "I'll fix him something to eat and give it to him!" I thought. I had another commitment just an hour or two later, and I would be coming back this way again.

A few hours passed and I hopped in the car to go. I was happily oblivious as I drove, then I came to that corner. He was still there. My heart sank.

I had forgotten about the sandwiches I was going to make.

I would have stopped at a nearby Arby's and picked something up really quick except I was cutting it close to be on time to meet my 1st grade friend that I mentor. So I drove on, resolving to stop on my way back. I'd only be gone for an hour, surely he'd still be there.

I came back, searching for him. He was gone. I prayed that God would give me a second chance.

Today, I went somewhere and on my back back, he was there again! Except he was on a weird corner and I couldn't get over fast enough. I was excited as I drove the few blocks home, planning what kind of lunch I would pack him. And I thought I'd call the homeless shelter in town to see if they had an opening and would take him in for the night. I'd give him a ride!

(Do not insert your concerns about my being 'safe' here unless you want a kind lecture from me telling you why I am not going to buy into that).

So I came home, pulled out the peanut butter and bread and my phone rang. I talked and laughed as I took my time making sandwiches, packing apples, and looking up social service contacts online. I got back in my car, and drove to the corner.

He was gone. I sank again. What a hopeless sinner I am. Why had I stalled? Why did I not called my friend back later? Why had I forgotten about him the first time I saw him?

I recently heard a speaker talked about living a life worth living. My take-home message: No regrets. Live like the person you always wished you were, loving people into God's kingdom.

I failed. Jesus waved to me from a corner, and I waved back, wishing him well, but not doing anything. I'm going to carry those sandwiches and apples in my car for a day or two just in case I run into him. And there will be no regrets next time.

Lord, forgive me.

Girly Post

This has the potential to be very girly, so beware...but I want to share a few fun things from the last couple of weeks.

My dear friends Kim and Rob were married a few weekends ago. Prior to the wedding, we had an English Tea themed shower for Kim. Everyone was invited to wear a hat, with prizes going to the most beautiful, most creative, and most unusual.

I won most creative by sewing a ton of old fashioned buttons on a straw hat. I inherited a Mason jar of buttons from my great-grandma, and I'm finally putting them to use!

Here's the whole crowd.























Girly Event #2-I Love My Booty Party
(I still can't say that without laughing)

So I'm super-proud of my roommate for this one. Lately, several of her friends and relatives have seriously struggled with eating disorders. More have dangerously low self esteem. It is a very real, very damaging problem. So she decided to do something to spark some healthy attitudes and behavior. In her fun-loving spirit, she threw a party, inviting a small group of girls who live with these issues to have fun together, talk honestly about this, and encourage each other in developing healthy attitudes.

This is what greeted you on the door to our apartment last night.
Posted all around our apartment were inspiring quotes and anecdotes that people could read as they wished. Each girl was given a notebook with their name on it, and throughout the night everyone was given the chance to write in everyone else's book something beautiful about them, physically or about their personality. Each person was encouraged to keep that notebook and continue adding to it more things they found beautiful about themselves or about life. Apparently someone thinks I have cute ears. Who knew?

After some dinner (pizza and salad, its all about balance...), we had a trivia game that included questions about current statistics of eating disorders, self-image, etc. The three competing teams were the Hotties of 26th Ave, the Buttless Beauties, and Tres Amigas. (Lol). A few shockers from the game: 80% of 13 year olds have attempted to lose weight and 5-10% of anorexic women will die within 10 years of the onset of the disease.

After trivia, we had a craft. Each woman got a pack of letters and a pretty stationary paper with the goal of unscrambling the letters and creating a positive phrase. If they wanted, they could write a little contract with themselves on the back about having a positive self-image. Here's a few finished products.

Then we watched a funny movie that dealt with having a healthy self-image, during which I had to leave to go to work. All throughout the night, anytime someone started to say something negative about themselves, they were immediately cut off and others replaced their words with positive comments. It was really encouraging, and I have no doubt it will make a difference for the gorgeous women, even if it is the first step towards health.

100 Things about Me

1. I'm a registered nurse.
2. I am currently in grad school to become a family nurse practitioner.
3. I'd also really love a master's in public health.
4. I used to not like kids.
5. Now I really like kids.
6. I help teach the 1st-5th grade kids at church on Sunday mornings.
7. I am starting a one-on-one mentoring program called KidsHope in a few weeks.
8. I volunteer at the Salvation Army Medical Clinic when I can.
9. I love serving people in need.
10. I get the biggest kick out of meeting basic needs: food, water, shelter, love.
11. I want to move internationally in the semi-near future to do that.
12. I love learning about different cultures and languages.
13. If I was doing something other than nursing, I'd work for a Christian non-profit agency helping people in crisis.
14. Or I'd be a photographer/reporter for National Geographic on human rights issues.
15. I like being really cheap.
16. The reason I try to be cheap is so I can give more away.
17. I became a Christian when I was 13.
18. I was baptized by my top role model.
19. I was scared to talk to my role model/mentor until this last year.
20. I become more amazed by God all the time.
21. A lot of people say I look like Natalie Wood who played Maria in West Side Story.
22. I've been a little self-conscious of my weight since college.
23. It's pretty silly that I am considering I am a big 112 lbs.
24. I've never said I've felt that way in "public" before.
25. I would live outdoors all the time if it never got hot or cold.
26. I really like running. I think I am physically addicted to it, though I'm just a casual jogger now.
27. I ran a marathon my senior year in college.
28. I don't have the itch to do another one yet, but I'd like to do a half marathon in the spring.
29. I did an internship in Minnesota in 2005 and moved here in 2006.
30. It still strikes me funny that I live here.
31. I love the down-home cabin feel of the rural parts and the trendy-green loving feel of the cities.
32. My friends know me better than my family.
33. I miss my grandma who died last year.
34. I learned to knit last winter, but have only done a lot of scarfs and one hat.
35. I don't think I've ever seriously been in love.
36. Though there are people I admire greatly from afar.
37. I have a really bad sweet tooth.
38. I like doing creative arts and crafts things.
39. I make my own stationary.
40. I love singing.
41. One of the few things I miss from Harding is singing with other believers.
42. Just about the only other thing I miss is the people.
43. I guess I miss some of the activities too, though I have different things going on now.
44. I tend to sing alto when there is not instrumental music, and soprano when there is.
45. People ask me to giggle for them sometimes because apparrantly my giggle is pretty funny.
46. I used to have a variety of nicknames, but nobody here uses them.
47. I love to read.
48. I used to get in trouble when I was a kid for reading too much.
47. I also got in trouble for talking back.
48. I'm better about that now.
49. I always wanted to have red curly hair like my sister's.
50. As I get older it is getting curlier, but it is still just brown.
51. Fall is my favorite season.
52. I like it best because of sweatshirts, colors, and pumpkin flavored everything.
53. This last winter in MN wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be.
54. I tend to be an optimist and see something good about everything.
55. Patients ask me all the time if I am old enough to be a nurse.
56. I get asked if I am in high school on a regular basis.
57. My favorite color is green.
58. My birthday is on St. Patrick's Day.
59. That's not the reason my favorite color is green.
60. I have a bad habit of eating unidentified berries when on a hike.
61. I'm not scared of dying.
62. A big part of my heart is in Honduras.
63. I spend exclusive time with God every day.
64. My faith has changed in incredible ways since I started doing that.
65. I used to play piano, but I haven't seriously in years.
66. It makes me really sad when I think of how I let my talent go.
67. If I could play another instrument besides piano, it would be the fiddle.
68. I really do like a small portion of country music.
69. One of my weaknesses is jealosy.
70. I love change.
71. I love surprises.
72. I used to be pretty strict about my shoes to matching my outfit, but now I don't care.
73. I love to wear skirts and chacos, sometimes together.
74. I think it is sad there are such things as rich Christians in a world of need.
75. I have a dream of living in a house in a poor neighborhood with several others.
76. I want it to be a safe place where we could get to know people and become involved in their lives.
77. I want to share possessions and live simply so we'd have more resources for outreach.
78. I want to help struggling people in that neighborhood.
79. I want to become friends with the kids.
80. I want to learn from those people who have a better idea of what community is than I do.
81. If I could take 3 types of items out of this world, they would be drugs, alcohol, and guns.
82. I am addicted to chapstick.
83. I don't like tv.
84. I am extremely picky about movies I like.
85. I am dependent on the internet.
86. If I had a super-power, it would be that of instant transportation.
87. And anybody who was touching me could go with me.
88. I've picked up enough of the MN accent to sound funny to people in TN, but not enough to hide my Southerness here.
89. I'm glad I grew up on a farm.
90. When people ask me where I want to live when I leave Rochester, I have a hard time answering.
91. In a rural area of some yet-to-be-determined underdeveloped country?
92. But then you have to explain more.
93. It's easier to just say Seattle or Denver or some other cool city.
94. But I usually end up telling the whole story.
95. Because I want people to know me.
96. I went for a long time where nobody really knew me.
97. That was years ago. I'm done with that now.
98. And I really want to deeply know other people.
99. I hope this post strikes you as funny and thought-provoking and not too self-centered.
100. I truly am grateful for the life I have.

Return of the Camera

Well, my duct-taped ghetto camera finally meandered its way to Rochester from Honduras where I left it this summer. It was abandoned in my favorite place to lose things: in the pocket on the back of the seat in front of me. I never used to be this forgetful.

Nevertheless, some pretty decent photos came back to me. The ones of buildings are part of the new children's home that opened just a few weeks ago. Amazing. God has prepared a place of paradise for these children who have been through hell. The rest are dear friends who live and serve full-time in Honduras.